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Quick hitter before going to jump on this thing…

Read it, don’t read it, I don’t care…just needed to get some things off my chest.

In no particular order of chronology or importance…

On the clock.  On an island.  On beach time, including getting off this laptop as soon as possible.  Let’s turn and burn.

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1)       Greetings and salutations.  Thanks for joining me.  Just sitting outside by our personal pool getting very quick thoughts off my chest before jumping on a catamaran for the day.  It has been a rough week.  This will be brief.

2)      And unedited for you grammar people.  My intern is with me in the Caribbean.

3)      I can’t believe the British Open is on right now and I don’t care that much.  I also can’t believe I didn’t get in the pool with it at work.  I am so not myself.

4)      Or maybe I am following the new rule for players limiting any type of betting.

5)      An early morning glance at the leaderboard does tell me this.  My boy Rickie Fowler is doing his thing, Sergio Garcia is reminding us that he is the best player possibly to not even sniff a Major by teasing us with a decent start to his round, and Tiger Woods  is tied for 46th and just…boring us diehard fans.

6)      For newbies, I am a DIEHARD Tiger Woods fan who is just frustrated with the mediocrity.

7)      Pics coming Sunday from vacation.  My notes carry over.

8)      Do you think Dwyane Wade and Chris Bosh have already hit Walgreens for some “missing you” cards?

9)      Hey, I spelled Wade’s name right.  I always forget about that letter switch, as do most people.

10)   Jimmy Graham signed a deal, and it wasn’t enough.  Dude got screwed.

11)   I will admit as I type this it is too early to go back in and wake everyone up to get bug spray, but I had NO idea they were so bad down here.  Wow.  ONE bad thing in paradise.  Moving on.

12)   I think Chris Kluwe has a case against the Vikings, and if even if he didn’t, he should try.  That thing ended bad.

13)   Steve Spurrier gave props to Nick Saban for his recruiting.  That is like me telling Jimmie Johnson he is pretty good at NASCAR.  Stating the obvious to a guy who has had  five #1 classes in 6 years.  Hey, I just involved NASCAR into a football hook.  What IS wrong with me?

14)   Lots of things.

15)   Napier is upset that LeBron is leaving, and has even unfollowed him on Twitter.  Well, three things.  One, he says he doesn’t even USE his Twitter account.  Well, fix that or own it.  Two, unfollowing him IS a Twitter abomination.  They track that stuff.  Three, it is not like YOU made the choice to go to Miami after he tweeted those accolades.  It just kind of HAPPENED, and it is not like Miami sucks or anything.

16)   Pat me on the back for keeping my work stuff up to date when I should have been a normal person and ignored everything.  It is what it is.  It is not like I am doing NEW stuff, I am passing along the emails to who they need to go to, and I AM a workaholic by nature.

17)   What the HELL is Mr. Silver talking about with this midseason tourney thing?  I am beyond skeptical it would work.  Just saying.

18)   Have a blast, Charlotte.  Lance Stephenson is an idiot with skills.  Let’s just chalk him up as another JR Smith.

19)   I missed the MLB ASG, but did I hear right that Tony Gwynn wasn’t honored?  Or honored wrongly?  What gives?

20)   I guess it is unfair for me to write a sports blog and ask YOU questions.  Sorry.  I am outside of the caring circle this week.

21)   Trunk Bay does NOT suck I will tell you.  Might have been one of my favorite beaches ever.  Lindsey’s dad has been to Hawaii, and says it is better here.  I have not been to Hawaii so I like hearing that.  Plus, I have realized there is SO much to do here, that nothing is really TOO busy.  Everything is spread out.

22)   I like that St. John still has $1 drink happy hours.  That is fancy.

23)   Everyone owns or rents a Jeep here.  Everyone.

24)   Really?  James Jones goes to the Cavs after Mike Miller just signed?  LeBron is just texting people he likes and building his empire.  Have a blast, Cleveland.  That is freaking awesome.  Jones gives them a SECOND shooter to maximize LeBron’s skills and spread the floor.

25)   Mike Miller might be my favorite NBA player.  Ok, top five.  Maybe, top ten.  Ok.  I have no problem with the guy.

26)   SO funny.  Memphis coach Josh Pastner hires a guy…who just so happens to be the father of THREE top flight recruits.  Hmmmm.

27)   I am excited for 2016, as Bama-USC will be a great opener.  Now let’s get to 2014 season already.

28)   Whatever they did for Jeter at the ASG, I am sure it was slightly overkill, slightly deserved, and slightly cheesy.

29)   Mike Trout.  MVP.  Nothing wrong with the best player in the game getting THAT award.  Matt, I hung out with some DIEHARD Mike Trout fans yesterday.  Told them he was our semi-local guy.

30)   Gary Player says that Tiger Woods should have 24 Majors so far.  That is what I have been saying for like 10 years.  Ugghhh.

31)   I never pictured myself owning a Golden Doodle as a dog, but things happen for a reason.  I am watching one while Lindsey is in Vegas next week, and I have made it clear that they MIGHT not get it back.

32)   Quick.  How many jokes can you make in 10 seconds about Floyd Mayweather saying “I don’t know who he is” in response to a question about Ronda Rousey and him fighting?

33)   Dammit.  Melo, I already despise you.  Stop doing things like taking $5 million less overall with the Knicks so the team can sign other players.  Just be the selfish player I know and love.

34)   Can someone else read Deadspin and let me know all of the funny shit going on with the site?

35)   I wish I was Carlos Boozer and was paid $17 million to NOT play basketball with a team.

36)   Do we CARE if the fiancée of Aaron Hernandez is lying or not?

37)   Spoelstra has “no regrets” about LeBron decision except we might find out very quickly he sucks as a coach.

38)   Ok.  Gotta go.  Hope you enjoyed or are at least more informed.  Will I blog tomorrow?  That is a CLOWN question, bro.  Peace.

39)   NOT blogging tomorrow.  Trust me.  Just a tagline.