Read it, don’t read it, I don’t care…just needed to get some things off my chest.
In no particular order of chronology or importance…
On the clock. I need to get one out, but tired from doing house errands and other stuff all day…but it IS Saturday night. Let’s turn and burn.
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1) Stanford ended up showing Oregon how football is really played. Any time a team has one guy rushes for FORTY FIVE carries and the team has the ball for over 42 minutes, you know who is control. I hope Mariotta is ok from his knee injury, but let’s be honest. Stanford was already owning them BEFORE that injury.
2) My favorite computer spot in my new place unfortunately faces away from the TV. I think next weekend I will go big mirror shopping.
3) In the other Thursday game, Baylor showed that a speed system CAN win. They didn’t exactly look video gamish against a tougher OU defense, but they still proved that their brand might work.
4) Of course, the fact that Baylor lacks schedule strength, and the fact that their next opponent, Texas Tech, got throttled today by Kansas State doesn’t help them at ALL. They need Texas and Oklahoma State to run the table and then get beat by them to have any chance at the big prize. Baylor will STILL only have beaten three ranked teams most likely by the end of the season.
5) Sounds like Justin Bieber had a hell of a visit in Brazil. Police questioning people about you spray painting a bridge along with a cute little video of you in bed while a Brazilian stripper comes up next to you? I know you spun this as you were tired from the show, but it was freaking morning, bro. The sun was out. She was hot, although you might want to swing by your doc before your next round of shows. I have a feeling you might have some sort of rash.
6) I have talked about JetBlue in past blogs. I love them. I have also made a Widespread Panic parallel. John Bell, the singer for my boys, plays about 3 hours of music and simply says “How y’all doing, see you in a few, and see you next time.” I was on two JetBlue flights. There was no talk about weather, turbulence, time, or anything else. It was simply “prepare for takeoff, seatbelts please, and have a good night.” Like it.
7) You Skins fans can say after your Vikings loss that this was the exact same spot you were in last year before running off 7 games straight. Look at me with a straight face and tell me you are doing the same thing this year. I know I won’t tell YOU with a straight face that the Steelers are running the table. I am a realist and a good judge of a below par team. Call me, Scott. We will chat.
8) Steve Blake hit a three pointer to beat Snowball in his return the other night. I am back from an internet search. Where did I go? I was looking at Steve Blake’s detailed history. I didn’t find what I was looking or hoping for, but I did find out something I never even heard about. This is crazy. Frank Martin (ex-K-State and present South Carolina coach) coached a team to two straight high school championships with Blake and Udonis Haslem. They were kicked out of high school basketball in Florida after it was found out that Blake and others enrolled with fake addresses. That is bizarre. Blake ended up at Oak Hill in Northern VA, which now explains to me how he ended up at Maryland. Seriously, that is good stuff.
9) I wish a lot of things on LeBron. I don’t wish injuries. I hope this lower back thing heals and he is ok. I want him to fail miserably from here out HEALTHY.
10) I am unsure of how exactly there is popcorn on our kitchen floor. Totally have no idea.
11) Whoever is doing it, stop selling Jesse Owens gold medals. Or perhaps I am just jealous I don’t have the money to purchase them.
12) In case you care, Eleanor is back in the shop. She stalled at stoplights, and no one could fix her. I finally took her to my mad Russian, Vitali, and he fixed it. It ran fine for a year. Then, I take her in for PREVENTIVE WINTERIZATION to a neighborhood (walkable) place, got charged $620, and I get her back to find her stalling again at lights. Neighborhood or not, I am putting Eleanor in the hands of Vitali for the rest of her time with me. Stay away from Penn Garage by the way…at least with an older Jeep.
13) The grass is green, the sky is blue, and Andrew Bynum’s knee hurts. It would be a shame if the guy had to retire already. Don’t worry, young’un. You and Greg Oden can go out and get shit faced together.
14) Richie Incognito had offensive lineman meetings at strip clubs.
15) Richie Incoginto feels sold out by Martin.
16) Richie Incognito is an idiot. Let’s make a second A Few Good Men. Kiefer and Tom are still alive and kicking and looking good.
17) If LSU loses this game, and their season ends up meaning nothing, I will personally blame it on the fumble that just occurred 1 foot from the goal line that I just watched. Sloppy.
18) Lindsey knows I am a closet Bama fan. Remember, I still LSU and the 12 points. I think this will NOT be a blowout.
19) Dibs to my lady for putting up the painting of Troy Polamalu right by the front door. That iis badass since I didn’t even lobby for it.
20) “Melo talks effort in players only meeting.” That is not a Busterism (wow, that is not a bad name for things I say). That is an actual headline. I know it is hard to believe. Combine this with former perennial All Star Amare Stoudemire averaging 4/2/0 for the year, and I think the East is the Heat, Pacers, Nets, and the Bulls if they decide to contribute this season.
21) If something IS really wrong with Steve Clifford (thoughts and prayers), does that mean MJ will have a coaching itch?
22) I hope Kobe gets healthy again, but does anyone else think he should have just retired any time in the last two years? Not exactly Elway like, but still would have been cool. Not Barry Sanders cool, but still pretty tight.
23) Tiger fired a 63 in the opening round in Turkey and now is 6 back after the second round. So, things are just like the last 7 years for the guy. Inconsistent as hell.
24) Jabari Parker had 22 for Duke, and Andrew Wiggins had 16 for Kansas. I would say that 16 will be the average this year for super stud Wiggins, preseason All American or not. I think it will be amazing watching Coach K adjust his style to cater to his squad. Parker won’t average 22, but it will be fun to watch. Odd side note that I only care about. Wiggins was #1 in the draft class AFTER Parker’s, until Wiggins graduated early. Parker dropped to #2. Probably a little motivation.
25) Lindsey just noted that she thinks the Aflac duck has a different voice. I happen to concur.
26) John Fox is out of the hospital. Here is hoping he gets better to enjoy what will most likely be a very enjoyable Broncos season.
27) Manziel might party and get on our nerves, but after another ho-hum 446 and 5 perfomance today, MAN that dude can play football. Check THIS out. I was entertaining myself reading mock drafts, as I do frequently (not a lie-I LOVE lists), and the one today mentioned that Manziel might go to Philly. Can you IMAGINE Johnny Football in Chip Kelly’s offense? When do I draft in fantasy football next year?
28) They had Bridgewater #1 over Clowney. Not sure I agree, but I guess it depends who is first.
29) Lindsey and I watched that Chimpanzee movie for a while last night. How do I say this? Tim Allen is NO Morgan Freeman.
30) My average is 15.3 times when I sneeze more than once. Last night, I went for 23 consecutive sneezes. That is stellar…if judging stellar is how many times you sneeze at one time. It is embarrassing when I am out and about. At least I only sneeze more than once about once a month.
31) Lindsey and I also got stuck on Elf last night. Man, Will is funny.
32) Eastbound and Down is one of the 5 or so shows that can get me to laugh uncontrollably out loud. Kenny Powers is SO freaking funny.
33) I am sorry. I noticed on another hook list note that Richie Incognito felt “betrayed” as opposed to “sold out.” Sorry. My bad.
34) Mark Duper is the latest football player to show CTE symptoms. Maybe it will erase how the Dolphins should have won like three Super Bowls with Dan Marino as their QB.
35) George Karl must be grinning these days after being let go and having the Nuggets start out 1-4 with pretty much the same cast (yes, minus Gallinari) that he took to 50 plus wins last year and the playoffs.
36) Have you Googled “Paul George” yet? The Pacers are 6-0, George is averaging 25.3 points, and Roy Hibbert is averaging a ridiculous 4.7 blocks per game. They are for real and mature, folks.
37) Lindsey and I bought all of this stuff for the house today. I used the drill and made some holes. I then decided to wait until her dad comes over tomorrow to help me. I am not good at this shit at all. He is, and once again, this move would not be possible without his sacrifice and assistance. Thanks, Steve. I think I am talking to someone that doesn’t read this blog, but I ALWAYS address people assuming they read it. I am over sending out reminder emails. I either write a blog, or explain WHY I am not writing one. Keep up. Just to test it, hello, Bob. You better never leave my company, because you are one of my favorite people ever…even when you uncontrollably sing on Friday afternoons with your blasted earphone music. Sad that you never made it passed the second season in Seinfeld though. Everyone has their flaws though.
38) Auburn beat Tennessee at their huge crib today. Auburn lost a lot last year. They then brought back a coach from their championship team a few years ago. He has them on a roll. Here is the kicker. They have a JC QB transfer that no one knew about. Sound familiar? Cam Newton and the boys did the same thing.
39) I spotted a headline about how Eastern Michigan’s coach was fired for “language.” How can you give a motivational speech without cussing? I didn’t read the article. I just know I would cuss like Bobby Knight would in motivating my boys.
40) The Dolphins say…never mind. I could write 40 hooks on that fiasco alone. I can’t help my hooks are listed all randomly on my legal piece of paper. I just brainstorm as the day goes and then write them in order.
41) I need to jump on Yahoo to confirm I didn’t pick him up, but nice that Jerome Simpson becomes a fantasy sleeper pick, goes and gets drunk to celebrate his new starting job, and then decides to drive. Classy, man. I am NOT deploying my Rant Squad scouts yet. Not strong enough, bro.
42) Patrick Warburton is one of the funniest human beings ever.
43) Home Depot is fun to me, but I feel like I am doing backstroke on the pavement next to the pool.
44) That is my spin on a “fish out of water.”
45) Florida State beat Wake today…probably because of pure adrenaline of being in the hunt after Oregon getting rolled on Thursday.
46) Did you see Pelicans Anthony Davis/ Unibrow’s stat line last night? I think it was 32/14/6. Get used to it, people. Dude was a guard in high school before shooting up like eight feet. He has MAD skills for a big man.
47) I still like the AT&T cutest kid commercial. Who am I kidding? I like ALL of those commercials. I just want to know if they are scripted, or do they just shuttle in random kids to the dude until something adorable happens.
48) I sell digital signage that splits up the monitor into “regions” that can contain videos, PPT’s, TV’s event listings, etc. Lindsey’s dad is helping me put a 42” commercial grade monitor right by our front door tomorrow. I am excited, and I now have my girl excited. We will walk in our door and see the weather, upcoming social events fed from a Googledoc, my sports watching schedule, the OU football schedule, ESPN feeds, etc. It is going to be SO dope. Drinking the Kool-Aid from my job.
49) I was doing errands. How DID Kansas State smoke Texas Tech? Hell, I think in my last blog, I took Tech and MINUS the points. I guess THAT bet didn’t turn out well.
50) Thanks for the text, Logan. I can’t wait for 2014 to come along and for me and you try to figure out a way to Brazil, and to have another drink with you someday. I am going to watch this Bama-LSU game. I am sure I will have time to post something tomorrow. Hope you enjoyed today’s. Will I blog tomorrow? That is a CLOWN question, bro. Peace.