FINALLY.

  1. Greetings and salutations, people.  Thanks for coming aboard (the boat).  Let’s move.
  2. It is Friday, and my low key new lifestyle and me would like to watch a movie tonight.  Let’s do this ONE sentence style.  One sentence per hook.  I am sure I will have more to say by Sunday.  It usually is the case anyway.
  3. Sorry not enough time to post anything this week-busy week.
  4. Whoooooaaaa.  We are in preseason football season a.k.a glorified, TV covered practice.  This is the first year I actually understand Broncos fans for WATCHING their games.  This QB battle is SO interesting, and I might be checking out the practices if I am them.  Do you go with the lower ceiling guy who is Alex Smith like boring?  Or do you go with the higher ceiling, more exciting guy who is better in the failed zone read offense and who John Elway personally traded UP to get?  So intriguing.
  5. What’s that?  Oh yeah.  One sentence, limited pics.  Starting NOW.
  6. People ask me if I watch any of the Steelers preseason games, I say not unless I am bored, have nothing to do, and I happen to turn to its channel on TV, and it just happened.
  7. I have the Steelers-Giants practice on in the background.
  8. I wish the Melo-Rockets trade talk would have waited until AFTER the PGA Championship.
  9. I have subconsciously and unwittingly stopped caring as much or at all about the Big 3 tournament.
  10. I have decided to put Kyrie in the conversation with Melo as one of my top hated players in the NBA.
  11. I don’t mind missing 311 these days for the reasons of A) I saw them on their FIRST tour way back when and therefore feel like one of the original parts of the fan base B) you could say that they have a “niche” OR that all of their songs sound relatively the same BUT C) that SAME song sound is actually pretty likable.
  12. Hey, Saints fans, you were on the clock this week for Why Your Team Sucks on Deadspin so hope you caught YOUR dose of reality.
  13. Decided to skip Jay Mohr this weekend as it sounds like a lot of effort for someone who probably isn’t as funny live as he is on Jim Rome.
  14. You know that teams are hoping that their QB’s stay healthy-otherwise an injury puts THEM in the “why aren’t you bringing on Kaep?” conversation.
  15. We are about two months out of Halloween, and I guess I should start working on my costume, as I promised myself last year when I was shopping last minute that I WOULD be Slash this year for Halloween.
  16. Process this if you will:  the Dodgers are SIXTEEN games above a team that is SIXTEEN games ABOVE .500…scary.
  17. I am not editing this tonight, folks, so deal with it please until I get an intern or a day moves to 26 hours a piece.
  18. Happy trails, Dutch, and you were a hell of a player, a decent dude, and glad you got a ring in 1997.
  19. AND Baylor died…rough week for sports.
  20. I heard that the Wolves owner wanted to sit down with Wiggins but never heard what HAPPENED when he got that sit down…weird.
  21. Exactly what Manziel needs is to be a younger coach when he is still mentally 10 years old…perfect.
  22. Hey, with it being official today that Tannehill is REALLY done his season, can the Fins bring on Johnny Football for insurance, depth, and my entertainment?
  23. Enough days have gone by since my last blog that I am unsure if Branden Albert is retired or not and if Richardson and Marshall are still exchanging social media jabs.
  24. As I just want to help you out, if you are a casual college football fan, and don’t know who Sam Darnold is, you better acclimate yourself with him very quickly.
  25. Things are adorable when Trout hits his 1000th hit on his birthday, Harper hits a HR also on that day, and Harper and Trout both get to 150HR’s at exact same age, but the Magic-Bird rivalry wasn’t born in the regular season and those dudes need to get deep in the playoffs pronto.
  26. I know his story, I know his skills, and I am on record, no matter whether him or Savage win the job THIS year, as saying Deshaun Watson will be a very, very good NFL QB.
  27. If I wasn’t doing this blog in one sentence hooks, we would be here a while so let’s both be glad I am doing it this way today.
  28. Say anything you want about Lane Kiffin, but the dude just locked up two more transfer TOP recruits in the last week for tiny FAU.
  29. If you can’t make a highlight reel hitting stuff, then just get hit BY stuff.  http://deadspin.com/minor-leaguer-learns-painful-lesson-about-gravity-gets-1797615807
  30. I wonder if swimming a mile warrants going to get a cookie, milkshake, or ice cream after I write this.
  31. My theory is this person definitely wasn’t trying to WIN.  http://deadspin.com/jenny-simpson-celebrates-wildly-after-taking-silver-at-1797614666
  32. If you have checked out updates on the Houston Nutt story AFTER the Hugh Freeze incident, then I admit you know more than me on that situation…congrats.
  33. We all thought Josh Rosen was saying dumb stuff about football and academics initially until we checked out the school stats, thought about what he said, and realized he was sort of on point.
  34. My GOT notes are at the end of this blog, but since we are still talking sports, did you catch Noah the Met in this VERY brief cameo?  http://deadspin.com/heres-noah-syndergaards-cameo-on-game-of-thrones-1797591010
  35. It WAS a nice toss.
  36. Speaking of on point things, this tweet is ON POINT.  
  37. Plus, I love flow charts.
  38. Mayweather says Conor “has the advantage” playing the whole game, but I read the article on the sparring partners for Floyd explaining THEIR view on the fight and was sold…again.
  39. One other thing on Kaep…this is also true (being that I was the guy constantly commenting on the Favre thing back in the day).  
  40. Lindsey is watching that 13 Reasons show, and my main comment is that it is the high school version of Big Little Lies, where you know there is a death, the rest of the show is about putting together the story, and there is a coffee shop.
  41. I admit to walking through the room here and there when she is watching and stopping to watch occasionally.
  42. The Knicks sign Michael Beasley, and I for one can’t think of a better marriage of talent and pandemonium/unrest in the world.
  43. When you first read that the Pats are the first team to get their own planes, you think “stupid Pats” but after crunching numbers of charter flights for the team for an entire season and it is not just for show.
  44. The “stupid Patriots” thing is funny to me because a Denver radio guy says like three things that they do badass and then usually just says “stupid Patriots.”
  45. The NBA putting the Cavs-Warriors on Xmas Day makes sense, and putting the Nets in front of Mexican fans does NOT make sense.
  46. Just a heads up that Civic Center Park is showing movies for one week, and we caught the Blues Brothers, and were very surprised how few people were taking advantage of the nice park, funny movie, food trucks, cornhole, and that Broncos homeless dude with long hair who gets high on spray paint.  
  47. Jurassic World is next week…the final week.
  48. Since I missed Back to the Future for GNR, you are damn right I will be there.
  49. I can’t believe that my next year hopes if Big Ben retires are with either Landry Jones or Josh Dobbs.
  50. On cue, Dobbs just threw his third INT.
  51. I can’t decide once again if I think the nickname end of August MLB thing will A) be stupid or B) be pretty funny and cool.
  52. LeBron just almost made people in Cleveland jump off bridges by inferring in a tweet to Jamal Crawford that L.A. is home.
  53. SI.com seems to have redone its layout again, and, if it is possible, it sucks worse than the previous new layout.
  54. Flowchart needed.
  55. You can hate tennis-that is your decision-but if you read a tennis article, try Deadspin for a nice twist.  http://deadspin.com/gael-monfils-wouldnt-lose-1797691806
  56. See, here is another fun tennis article.  http://deadspin.com/nick-kyrgios-hit-in-butt-1797680816
  57. I know it is different leagues and all, but I feel like Premier League just finished even if it is just starting.
  58. By the way, SI wrote a good article on Neymar in a recent issue.  https://www.si.com/soccer/2017/08/01/neymar-brazil-world-cup-barcelona-psg-messi-ronaldo
  59. You can wait to read it until later, but know it mentions Bull Durham and Crash Davis more than once, meaning it is a cool article.
  60. I think anyone who hasn’t seen Bull Durham at least three times is weird.
  61. I feel bad for servers and bartenders, because even though I don’t drink now, I drink ice tea very, very, very fast.
  62. College football season is almost here thankfully, we are heading to Seattle and Vancouver for Labor Day, we have a morning til night schedule that would exhaust people READING it, but I had to make sure we held Saturday evening that weekend for FSU-Bama, as it will be EPIC.
  63. The SEC is not exactly a basketball powerhouse outside of UK, but THEY even noticed I assume when not only the older Porter brother (and future #1 pick next year) transferred to Mizzou and then THIS week his YOUNGER brother reclassified and will play WITH him.
  64. Wow…one is 6’10 and the other is 6’11.
  65. Does anyone else find it ironic that the two L.A. football teams have three fights in one practice in a town where people are too lazy and apathetic to even make kickoff or tip?
  66. Listen, I don’t wish WRONG on the dude, but some happy place still exists with me when a guy like Zach Randolph gets busted for possession with intent on distribution…it is what it is.
  67. Not a Walmart guy, but happy their new back to school has the best song of all time a.k.a Here I Go Again by  Whitesnake.
  68. Isn’t it also ironic that I tune in the TV to the Steelers preseason game and they cut away for a DIFFERENT practice midway through it?
  69. White Pie just opened in Uptown Denver, and I will rank this lasagna #3 all time behind Lindsey’s family recipe with white sauce, and…Rome.
  70. Pretty sure Rome will only lose in my lifetime to another lasagna place IN Rome.
  71. Loud laughers HAVE to know they laugh too loud for public…be happy, but just tone it down a little.
  72. I started reading the KD article about him talking about his price cut critics, but then realized I hate him along with Melo and Kyrie, so I stopped reading.
  73. Wow, sad to hear about a coach wanting to bring in Navy SEAL training to his football practice, having them do the traditional log drill, and having a kid DIE when hit in the head by the log.
  74. I wanted to read the article on ESPN about Rio a year after the Olympics, but had read enough articles about cities after the Olympics and it is just downright DEPRESSING.
  75. I saw an article about Tim Tebow doing something really nice for a fan at a ballgame, but luckily it didn’t load on my phone at the time.
  76. I am not saying that you have to be addicted to sports like me or others, but can you at least stay in REALITY????  http://ftw.usatoday.com/2017/08/jeopardy-contestants-college-football-questions-video-notre-dame-nebraska
  77. Did they ever find the Cardinal rally cat?
  78. I saw the appearance, I saw it was missing, and now NOTHING.
  79. Maybe it is me, but I find ANY article about Lenny Dykstra really funny.  http://deadspin.com/lenny-dykstra-doesn-t-dispute-sexual-harassment-claim-1797718512
  80. Brooks is so tough he is even messing up marshals on the course.  http://deadspin.com/brooks-koepka-tee-shot-bloodies-course-marshal-1797714197
  81. Just trying to put together the more interesting stories on Deadspin for you to save you time.  http://deadspin.com/cbs-sports-writer-ethan-skolnick-arrested-for-allegedly-1797731522
  82. Come on, you KNOW you love ANY article and photos about John Daly.  http://deadspin.com/here-are-some-snapshots-from-john-dalys-last-24-hours-1797733879
  83. LaVar Ball on SNL.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3OvJrkc7wgE
  84. I dare you to make it through all three minutes…but I will tell you overall it is worth it.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t9il52dlnnc
  85. I wish Fournette would play a few REAL downs in the NFL before calling everyone slower than he thought.
  86. We would all agree what Penn State does NOT need is a sports related story with the terms “frat gauntlet” in it.
  87. I think the only winner in the Watkins trade was Sammy getting out of the subpar city of Buffalo.
  88. Tyrod Taylor will start going to church this week I predict.
  89. Gonna be tough for Dak to start out fast with Elliott out for the first 6 games, and every opponent in those first games is out drinking themselves to the FLOOR tonight out of celebration.
  90. A homeless guy works out at the Y, and the fact that he allocates the cash to workout and be the best in shape homeless guy in Denver makes you rethink buying stuff aimlessly on Amazon.
  91. I actually have been very well behaved lately, but maybe that is directly related to me not selling much right now at work or not.
  92. My Game of Thrones notes:
  93. I like my colleague’s theory that Jaime will live, get taken prisoner by Dany, and will end up killing his sister even though he was boning her like two episodes ago, making him AGAIN a king slayer.
  94. We FINALLY got extended dragon-war air time, and they could have at least had Drogon kick serious ass before they brought out that dragon killer slingshot thing.
  95. Where are the people who are “mining” for this dragon glass for Jon Snow and did he just draw those pics on the cave wall right before bringing Dany through?
  96. At least we got a joke about Jon looking at Dany’s “heart.”
  97. No Sam and no Euron, so not a completely PERFECT episode, but they DID bring it.
  98. Love that Ayra is officially back from that weird side plot, love that she is a badass, but unsure how she is blocking a big sword with her tiny poker.
  99. Line of the night was from Ayra:  “from no one.”
  100. I think Hardhomme still was a better fight scene.
  101. We won’t even get INTO the fact that people travel to all parts of this continent in milliseconds.
  102. Interested to what Tyrion is thinking about.
  103. How can that warrior say Tyrion’s peeps can’t fight when they have a freaking DRAGON???
  104. Littlefinger HAS to know that personality less Bran knows what he did…but here is the history of the dagger if you care.  
  105. Hey, Littlefinger, Bran just quoted a line from you in a place where NO one was…”chaos is a ladder.”
  106. Bronn just saves people all the time.
  107. We must have missed the episode when Dany got her dragon trained at PetSmart.
  108. But, all jokes aside, we all love the show and you are weird if you don’t watch it.
  109. PGA thoughts, but MUCH more to come as my weekend is again targeted on it with my couch.
  110. The leaderboard went from a random collection of Google lookups to Kisner (one of best players to never win one) to Day to Hideki to LOUIS.
  111. If you look at the second half of the leaderboard, it looks like a US Open, with players getting their ass just KICKED.
  112. Adam Scott could have at least made the freaking CUT.  Ugghhh.
  113. Like I said, more to come on this.  I like Fowler still and thinks he moves a lot on moving day.
  114. That’s it for today.  Hope you enjoyed or are at least more informed.  Will I blog again?  That is a CLOWN question, bro.  Talk to you probably Sunday or Tuesday.  Peace.
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