Read it, don’t read it, I don’t care…just needed to get some things off my chest.
In no particular order of chronology or importance…
On the clock. Old format (didn’t have energy to organize into “Buster Eggs,” etc.). Let’s turn and burn.
1) Hello, trendy pick. Everyone is thinking the Lakers might give a run to the Spurs. I know it is only one game, but I personally saw no trace of that possibly happening yesterday. Duncan can handle the twin towers, and the Spurs guards can pull Tecmo Bowl Bo Jackson/ Deion Sanders/ Barry Sanders, running circles around the Lakers small guys. They might win one at their crib. And by the way, Kobe, stop tweeting your coaching advice during the game. You are not exactly just a bystander or fan, but you are not there. Be quiet. Your Zen-like advice of getting it more to the post is like saying that a car goes forward with gasoline in it.
2) The Thunder beat the Rockets soundly last night. Five games might be a stretch. I see it as five games because the launchers in Houston will have ONE hot night from outside. Amazingly, out of 25 people, only myself and one other person has the Thunder all the way in our office pool.
3) The Heat beat the Bucks by 23 last night. When guaranteeing a six game victory, I am SURE Bucks Brandon Jennings accounted for this loss. Just warming up, are we? Yeah.
4) I saw This is Forty last night to see how immature I actually am. Paul Rudd is funny as hell, the first 30 minutes were absolutely hilarious, but this 2:17 could have been done in about 1:17. After the weird spinoff into the dysfunctionality of their fathers and family, they lost me. A lot of people are 40, but not all 40 year olds have similar families. You broke from the concept. This accounted for about an hour of the movie until it circled back around and ended funny again.
5) You are telling me I can’t get a sniff of a sports announcing job (I guess I would have to try first…whatever), and THIS guy gets one? Check out the most prolific start to an announcing career in sports. Keep listening though, as his background is “he knows what it is like being from the east coast.” By the way, punk, West Virginia is not really “east coast.” http://www.awfulannouncing.com/2013/april/aj-clemente-anchor-swearing-video-fail.html
6) Neil Diamond singing Sweet Caroline at Fenway was beyond cool and classy in a difficult week.
7) Shaq is one person I WOULD believe that this wasn’t for payment on a bet. http://sports.yahoo.com/blogs/nba-ball-dont-lie/shaq-runs-around-nba-tv-set-underwear-because-155407980–nba.html
8) The Cavaliers are looking at Phil Jackson again? I thought yesterday’s story was the Mike Brown reunion. You would think with all of this pub that Cleveland was actually GOOD. Who cares?
9) JR Smith was named 6th man of the year in the NBA. Great stats, and he WAS key in some important wins. That being said, can we refrain from giving him awards on ANY level? That is JUST what we need…an excuse for him to shoot MORE. Dude barely gets through normal sized doors with his gigantic ego.
10) I don’t watch chick flicks like most normal guys, but I am a SUCKER for The American President for some reason. It was on last night as the in between game “filler.” Damn you, Karate Kid, for starting that late. I am in BED by 9-930 usually on Sundays. I couldn’t watch my final scene.
11) FINALLY (huge breath). I am SO excited to welcome our newest Rant Squad member OFFICIALLY. Because of his level of arrests, I had to wait until he got four instead of the minimum three arrest qualifications. Anyway, please welcome Ravens Rolando McClain, who got arrested less than a month after signing with the Ravens. Disorderly conduct and resisting arrest outside a park will do. He joins my classy organization of Floyd Mayweather, Ron Artest, Dennis Rodman, Diego Maradona, Jennifer Capriati, Sebastian Janikowski, Marcus and Michael Vick, Ryan Leaf, Lawrence Phillips, Allen Iverson, and other distinguished athletes/ ex-athletes. I am excited about your addition, Rolando. Since I am giving you direct Fillerbuster induction, we can skip the usual preliminary interview by Sebastian Janikowski. Get out on bail, and Marcus Vick will come pick you up with a car full of guns and Mad Dog, and reservations at the finest Vegas strip club. May the force be with you. I had to snip this from Wiki since I couldn’t find a clean list, so sorry for it being cut off. You still get the picture. Here are his credentials:
12) That is it. Quick hitter. Will I blog tomorrow? That is a CLOWN question, bro. Peace.