Yeah, well, I ALSO cook…

Read it, don’t read it, I don’t care…just needed to get some things off my chest.

In no particular order of chronology or importance…

On the clock.  Twenty minutes.  Brief work break.

I feel the need…the need for speed.

1)  In the idiot comment of the last 24 hours, former Notre Dame RB and present analyst Allan Pinkett has proclaimed that Notre Dame would be better with “criminals” on the team, and fans shouldn’t be worried about a few off the field problems this year.  He says it would give them more of an edge.  Brilliant, Allan.  I hate to break the news to you, but nice, smart kids can also have an edge on the field, court, or ice.  Coach K has done fine with his nice guys at Duke over the years in basketball, the Stanford football program is doing just fine these days with no arrests, and Ohio State still couldn’t beat anyone from the SEC WITH a good amount of criminals.  I think it goes a little deeper than that, Allan.

2)  John Elway is going to do Dove commercials for their men’s products I hear.  The Fillerbuster will stay away from this one.  The dude has two Super Bowls and then walked away on the spot-coolest thing an athlete can do.  Like the Broncos or hate the Broncos, he can do whatever the hell he wants, and can advertise for perfume and dresses if he wants as far as I am concerned.

3)  Sad to see Chris Cooley cut by the Skins.  Along with being a great player in his prime and a class act, he was a really, really fun guy to have on your fantasy football team playing like three positions.

4)  Whoops.  They spend SO much time on the technology that Madden 2013 got the wrong pic for a player.  Will the real Marcus Thomas please stand up, please stand up…

5)  I won’t be picking tonight’s game, but I will try and break down the big college football games over the weekend with spreads in tomorrow’s rant…for you NOT retired gamblers.  I am actually pretty darn good at picking games ever since it is not my money on it back in the day.  I consider myself a consultant.

6)  The Skeeters have spoken!  Roger Clemens WILL pitch again, and they are looking at the 8th for that start.  Thanks for keeping the media frenzy going, and the Astros scouts scrambling.  That being said, what is up with the LONG time in between?  I know he is old, but he is still pitching on THAT level of baseball.  Shouldn’t he be rolling on something a little less than 2 weeks rest?

7)  Bring in all the big name disappointments you want, LA Dodgers.  If you don’t have THIS guy, you are not running the table.  Book it.  Anyway, Matt Kemp is day to day because of this collision.

8)  I saw the movie Lockout last night with Lindsey, almost irritating her with me jotting down movies it was ripping off in obvious fashion.  It is very watchable, I admit.  I summarize it by saying it starts off with mindless and enjoyable action, then merges into kind of a lost middle, and then has an exciting and even clever ending.  Fun movie overall.  AND.  If you take certain parts from all these movies, you will see that I don’t even think they had a movie shooting, and maybe they just photo shopped faces on the actors and actresses.  Here is the list.

Aliens, Bourne, Under Siege (I think I might have to watch that this weekend as Lindsey has not seen this high, high quality flick), Star Wars, Armageddon, Con Air, Diehard, Executive Decision, Shutter Island, and Minority Report

8a)  I have decided that you can write off pretty much ANYTHING if your movie is in the future.

8b)  I am ok with them ripping off Bourne’s orchestra background, as long as no action movie EVER has pigeons in it.  Ever.

9)  The Jaguars are being stubborn…and kind of smart.  They won’t trade Maurice Jones-Drew this season.  Not saying he is right or wrong, but must be nice to not even blink at losing $30,000 a DAY while holding out.  Must be nice, and he will play.  The RB window of opportunity is much too short to sit out for a year.

10)  868 pages on Paterno in the FBI file, and Sandusky is not even MENTIONED.  And you think I am a long writer sometimes…

11)  John Isner evidently had shit to do this year after his first round match at the US Open.  Famous for being somehow involved with some of the longest Grand Slam matches in history, he won in a speedy 6-3, 7-6 (7-5), 5-7, 7-6 (9-7).  He must just LOVE being on the court.  That was a fast one for you, slacker.

12)  I can’t believe that the Phils were 61-67 earlier this week, just 6 games under .500 and I was kind of excited.  Sad.  Different type of year I guess.  Nice to see the Red Sox fans are having the same problem over there.

12a)  Don’t look now, but those pitching injuries might be catching up to the Yanks.  3-6 in their last 9 games.  Meanwhile, the low payroll Oakland A’s have won 5 straight.  There is some crazy stuff going on in the AL.  Whoever ends up in this new one game wildcard game on that side is just going to make it an INSANE game with REALLY good teams.


13)  I hear Marlins skipper Ozzie Guillen is going to be “tougher” on hurt players next year. I truly believe that guy carries around ANOTHER baseball cap in his free hand, and when he gets lonely, he reaches in that cap to pull out a piece of paper with the NEXT odd/ dumb/ crazy thing to say to the media to get press.

14)  She might be on a website and I might not, but this is just a dumb take on steroids if you ask me.

15)  SOCCER UPDATE:  Real Madrid beat Barcelona, and Christian Ronaldo and Messi both scored.  There is your soccer update.

16)  Damn.  I guess that means I have to do a NASCAR update.  Ok.  Here you go.  “Tony Stewart doesn’t get fined for throwing his helmet at another car.”  Here is the video for your entertainment.

You are updated on NASCAR now.

17)  Happy trails, Kim Clijsters.  She lost her last singles match of her career as she walks away from the game.  You got four Grand Slams and were no slouch.  Fantastic tennis player and the game will miss her.

18)  The Jets had a “leadership” day instead of practicing the other day.  That is great.  It is awesome that you are trying to reel in some of the headcase arguments you lads are having, but I don’t think that your receiver depth was helped by it.  In case you care by the way “Tebow is focused on TD’s, not stats.”  Thanks, Tim.  I can now sleep better tonight.

19)  That is it.  Back to work.  Hope you enjoyed.  Will I blog tomorrow?  Well, as my boy, Bryce Harper, who happened to hit two HR’s last night (before getting ejected of course) would say, that is a CLOWN question, bro.  Peace.

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