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They might be Giants…

Read it, don’t read it, I don’t care…just needed to get some things off my chest.

In no particular order of chronology or importance…

Kind of on the clock.  On a work trip, finished my today’s work later than I thought, and don’t feel like sitting around the hotel room ALL night.  These hooks will probably be QUICK.  Speed round…

Let’s turn and burn.

1)  Have you heard about any developments on the NHL talks front?  Nor have I.  Nice effort level there, guys…

2)  Yay.  The NBA is back.  The Lakers looked like shit (but so did the Heat at the beginning of the season the first year with LeBron-keep THAT in mind), the Heat’s Wade and Celtics Rondo seem to genuinely dislike each other, and the Cavs have a winning record for at least one more night and the Wizards are 0-1, which will probably be a trend.

3)  Thanks to whoever has my swim trunks, whether that be the chick who ripped them off from the laundry room for her boyfriend or the Hampton Inn on one of my trips…my Iowa City hotel has a hot tub.  Got to ghetto it with gym shorts…

4)  Dwight Howard went 3-14 from the free throw line last night.  You DO know that you can practice free throws even if you can’t run and jump, right Dwight?

5)  Sorry to see all the cancelled NYC sporting events, but glad to see they are still rolling with the marathon that is coming up.  It will be spiritually good.

6)  Before you see this new Red Dawn movie coming out at Thanksgiving, PLEASE make sure you see the original one.  PLEASE?  You will know how the cheesiness MADE that movie and how it can never be done better…It would be like remaking Caddyshack or Commando off the top of my head.  It wouldn’t work.

7)  NFL trade deadline.  Nothing on Steven Jackson, and the only real movement is a WR who wasn’t a starter with a big salary going to a team that just had a WR hurt.  Boring…

8)  John Clayton might look goofy, but he surely knows his shit.  This hook/ idea was already written down on my list BEFORE I just saw the new ESPN commercial with the Slayer T-Shirt.  Classic.

9)  Weird.  Greg Jennings wants to come back and play.  He needs a surgery.  A storm hits the east coast.  The airport closes in Philly, so he CAN’T go get surgery yet.  Who’d of thunk?

10)  The Knicks/ Nets game is postponed because of Sandy.  Guess we will still just have to hypothetically guess who the better mediocre team in the area is for another few days.

11)  If only I could transfer fantasy team players to other leagues.  Lindsey and I barely have two starting RB’s, and I am sitting RB’s who might get 10-15 points.

12)  No pressure.  I am selling to my CEO’s hometown tomorrow.  I am sure he won’t notice how THIS one turns out.

13)  THAT was fast.  James Harden is locked up by the Rockets for 5 yrs/ $80 million.  Worth it, and am I crazy to say that I kind of see a OKC Thunder like team about 2-3 years from now?  I like the roster.  God knows they have made enough trades in the last two years to GET this squad.

14)  I don’t know why, but I like flying on really tiny planes.  Have no idea why it is so fun to me.

15)  I am not saying it will happen, but if the stars COULD align, Bama IS playing LSU in the one place no one wants to play at night…ever.  AT LSU.  AT night.  Bama still wins this one by 10 points.

16)  The White Sox signed Jake Peavy to a 2 year extension yesterday.  I had no idea that the White Sox were still spenders, and REALLY didn’t have an idea that Peavy was still that good.  Must be a lack of options.

17)  Dan Gilbert is “sorry” for saying that the Cavs would win a championship before LeBron.  He is not sorry.  He is just backtracking on a statement that ended up not being true.  I wouldn’t want to have a beer with Gilbert.  I would like to POUR a beer on him.

18)  The Nuggets signed Ty Lawson to a 4 year deal.  I like it.  Dude is a LITTLE short (hey, that was an accidental pun…or whatever that grammatical thing I just did is), but his skills are obvious, he fits into the offense well, was their leading scorer, and really just wins wherever he goes.  He is like a basketball playing, sex-having, more talented Tim Tebow.

19)  The Warriors upped Stephen Curry to a new 4 year extension.  Read the fine print, Stephen.  They HAVE to be accounting for your 40 missed games a year due to injury SOMEHOW.

20)  Amare Stoudemire will be out 6-8 weeks due to surgery.  I don’t think he is hurt.  I think the Knicks management is giving themselves a built in excuse if this band of misfits doesn’t work out.

21)  The US women’s soccer team hired a new coach.  Do you actually think I am going to provide more information or continue this hook?  You don’t read the rant very often. It is just a freaking item on my legal pad list.

22)  Ex-LSU Jordan Jefferson is back in jail after smoking up with Tyrann Mathieu.  I think it might be where you belong, Jordan.  So.  Either come out of jail, do something REALLY stupid and I will throw you on the Rant Squad, or perhaps they have a jail football team.  You will be a star.  Maybe Lawrence Phillips can be on your team.

23)  I wasn’t even sure on that last hook if Phillips WAS still in prison.  It just FELT like he should be in there.  I was right.

24)  For anyone worried about Notre Dame going undefeated, do you KNOW that they have Pitt, BC, Wake, and USC left.  In their dream world, USC would knock off Oregon this weekend, and then they would knock off USC in their finale.

25)  If you were lucky enough to catch Around the Horn on Halloween, you got a treat (no pun intended).  Cowlishaw was Al Davis, complete with reverb on his voice.  It was awesome.

25a)  Israel Gutierrez was Obama, complete with Secret Service in the background and exact speech patterns.  Classic.

26)  Lindsey cooks incredible food.  I don’t ask what she puts in each thing, but she knows not to put green stuff, mushrooms, beans, or olives, and it ALWAYS is incredible.  Nothing like a guy with my metabolism likes more…lots of great food.

27)  Closer Rafael Soriano opted out of his Yankees contract.  If Mariano Rivera is on the fence in any way, I think this might just push him over.

28)  San Fran had its parade today.  Something tells me that, it being Halloween, there was about 50% of the attendees in either Panda outfits or with big beards.

29)  200 pages left on The Panther after 90 minutes of reading on the plane.  It is awesome.

30)  I admit it.  I have never seen the Night before Christmas.  I was confused if it was a Xmas or Halloween movie for a while, but I enjoyed it nevertheless.  I picked up on this movie about a year after that I realized that if you put “chipotle” in front of anything, I think I will eat it.  Late bloomer.  No, I will not bite on chipotle mushrooms.

31)  I don’t care that Michael Vick was named the starter still today.  I care that he plays the Saints, Tom Brady has a bye week, and someone in my league must have gotten drunk and left him on the wire.  Word to THAT.

32)  Did you SEE the Anthony Davis costume from Ludacris??  Check it out.  Dead ringer.

33)  DeAngelo Hall says the ref was equally at fault and that HE would like to speak with Goodell.  Oddly, Hall doesn’t have any hits on him for mouthing off to the refs as of YET.  But, I don’t believe him.  I am just part of the masses, but every interview I have seen, every action he has done, and every innuendo he gives me…leads me to believe that he is just an idiot who happens to also be a hothead.

34)  Congrats to the Baltimore Orioles for getting two guys on the Gold Glove award list for MLB.  What?  Hold on.  Say again?  WHAT?  THREE?  Adam JONES?????  Mike Trout wasn’t ON it at all?  WTF.  Someone get that whole voter base together, feed them bourbon (so they are in a good mood…NOT because you need to be liquored up to see his genius in the field), and MAKE them watch all of the Mike Trout catches for the year.  That is just WRONG.  Four errors all year in the toughest spot on the field?  Check the stats, people.  He is better.

35)  We had pumpkin carving night with Lindsey and her roommate the other night.  I haven’t done this for as long as I can remember, so I was at a loss for what to carve.  It is THEN when my default/ subconscious mind came into play and saved me.  The pumpkin evidently has already been trashed by squirrels (probably Browns fans…because they are BROWN…yeah, I know.  My humor sucks.), so I will show you what I came up with.

View photo.JPG in slide show

36)  Finally, I hear the Jaguars are looking at Tebow in a trade.  It is pretty obvious that Rex Ryan didn’t want Tebow and that this was ALL owner wishes.  I actually think it might work for ticket sales and the fact that they can’t get much worse, but DON’T think it will happen.

37)  Going to grab some grub in downtown Iowa City.  I hope you enjoyed.  Will I blog tomorrow?  That is a CLOWN question, bro.  Peace.