That is one magic loogie…
Read it, don’t read it, I don’t care…just needed to get some things off my chest.
In no particular order of chronology or importance…
On the clock. Speed version. Day rant. Let’s turn and burn.
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1) Greetings and salutations, people. Thanks for joining me. Hope everyone enjoyed Jackie Robinson Day and more importantly the significance of it. Sports can be petty in relation to a lot of life’s issues, so it is nice when a sports story overlaps into a “movement” and “generation changing.”
2) Rice cooker. Hoax. Not a hoax. Whatever. Unattended backpacks in Boston ANYWHERE are not cool at ALL. Stay strong, my third favorite city in the U.S.
3) As soon as a timetable is put on Warriors Andrew Bogut’s injury, the better. It will be nice for those players to know if they need to permanently or temporarily adjust during the playoffs. By the way, how bad of luck does that team have? Last year, it was superstar David Lee. This year, it is 7’0” monster Bogut. I personally would like to see that team play running on all cylinders just once.
4) He said “I am content with college as opposed to the NBA.” What I heard is “I am content raking the top recruits illegally and making them oddly want to come off the bench until someone figures out how I am doing it.” Cheaterpari.
5) The top 25 highest paid athletes list was released. Standing oddly in the middle of the top 8 or 9 winners was Matthew Stafford. One of these things is not like the other. Way to underachieve, bro. You stick out like a sore thumb. Well, you and #9 Matt Ryan. I would also like to thank my Phillies for having TWO players on there who aren’t really doing much of anything.
6) “I was just taking a tour of the NFL. It was nice.” Matt Flynn is back with the Packers.
7) New nicknames are flying around for Shabazz Napier and we can’t keep track of them. Him merely indicating he went to bed hungry Sunday night before the NCAA Final because he had no money has single handedly gotten college athletes unlimited meals on scholarship moving forward. About time. THAT was the reason I decided to join a fraternity instead of play college sports.
8) Well, sort of. It is complicated.
9) Melo has a small tear in his shoulder but will not require surgery. This means he can use that shoulder to hold his phone in calls to Thibs.
10) I think Aaron Hernandez KNOWS his story will be a movie someday and just adds little things to make it better…like threatening to kill a security guard and his family with a machine gun mockery.
11) The key about Phil Jackson and his legend is when other teams look at Lamar Odom, we doubt it. When HE does it, it is genius.
12) I think this whole Donald Trump buying the Bills is an extended April Fool’s joke.
13) I hope to break down the NBA and NHL playoffs in the next couple days. Sorry. These speed rants don’t allow for random sarcasm AND thoughtful team breakdowns.
14) The Clippers won a record 57th game for a season. These are not our Dad’s Clippers. Bringing in Chris Paul was getting the Jack of Diamonds. Getting Doc Rivers was deciding to shoot the moon and take the Queen of Spades also.
14a) Damn, I miss that game. I need to find three friends to do a round robin of spades, hearts, and poker. Or maybe one to play chess. The computer doesn’t drink with me.
15) I think I would care about San Fran’s memorable 12th inning win over the Dodgers if there were less games in a season.
16) Which is also why I am not freaking out that one player hit three home runs in a game off Stephen Strasburg…
17) There is a two week break for the Pistorius trial, meaning he has two more weeks to perfect that brilliant fake cry.
18) Sad to hear about that South Korean ferry sinking. Scary story that is made worse by the fact that there were 325 young students on board going on a field trip/ vacation to their version of Hawaii.
19) Quick. Name the two QB’s that newly signed QB Josh Freeman is competing for #2 with on the Giants. I only got one of them. Answers at the end of the blog.
20) Finally, mad props to the Mets affiliate Brooklyn Cyclones, who not only designated July 5th as Seinfeld Night and will be giving away a Keith Hernandez “Magic Loogie” bobblehead, but also gave me a non sports theme for the day.
21) That is it. Hope you enjoyed or are at least more informed. Will I blog tomorrow? That is a CLOWN question, bro. Peace.
22) Curtis Painter. Ryan Nassib.