It’s like American Hustle and Wolf on Wall Street told him he looked like Al Pacino…

Read it, don’t read it, I don’t care…just needed to get some things off my chest.

In no particular order of chronology or importance…

On the clock.  Day rant.  Speed version.  Let’s turn and burn.

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*******I am shaving my head on March 14th to help fight childhood cancer.  The children and I appreciate any donations, small or large, at http://www.stbaldricks.org/participants/mypage/698247/2014

1)       Greetings and salutations, people.  Thanks for joining me.  Quick one today.  Unlike Pistorius pleading not guilty, I am not lying.

2)      What a meltdown by Rory yesterday.  It is like all of the conversations about him and Tiger have morphed into some Rory-Tiger meltdown combo.  It is like a failed golf superhero.

3)      I lost DECISIVELY the Oscar prediction game against Lindsey.  When your gut tells you American Hustle is going to make a run and that doesn’t happen at ALL, then you lose a lot or predictions.

4)      So, with McConaughey winning a big one last night, is Leonardo the best player to never win a title?  (With Departed, he was just along for the ride) Probably so.  Leonardo, try and ignore all of those talk shit drunk texts early this morning from Matthew.  He was still thanking himself for his win.

5)      New helmets.  New uniforms.  Now the Bucs just need to put some talent IN those fancy new things.  Either that and come clean how EVERY year is a rebuilding year in their eyes.

6)      Albert Pujols says he needs to stop being Superman and just stay healthy and hit.  We hope so.  I am personally running out of jokes about you getting paid and then tanking for the duration of the contract.

7)      The Bulls are hot, and now Jimmer is aboard.  I said it yesterday and I will say it again.  I just feel like something might happen in Chicago.  We will see.  Get your nicknames for the hype ready right now.

8)      Indiana beats Ohio State and causes more March Madness confusion.  Ohio State is acting like it has no interest in Dancing even though it’s going.  IU is acting like that is all they want to do and they are missing talent and injured.  Arkansas won yesterday and they are not very good.  Prepare for LOTS of subpar Big 6 conference teams going down in the first round to experienced mid majors.  Just advance Stephen F. Austin right now over like….St John’s if they make it in.

9)      I have decided St. Louis can’t score, and therefore should not be in my Final Four.  Just put Michigan State in their spot until I sort this out.  I can’t seem to find four teams who look like they could win 6 straight.

10)   The Skins franchise Brian Orakpo.  They are smart to keep that guy, although I wouldn’t say he is as excited to not get that long term contract instead.

11)   It is called a Daily Jolt because that is exactly what it is.  I get it.  But please have some method to your madness, CNNSI writer.  It said “Tony Romo to be traded for Manziel?,” I clicked on it, and it was just some dude hypothesizing.  Hell, I could give everyone a jolt every day if I just made shit up and posted it.

12)   Peyton Manning passed his contract written check up today, and now it is windy outside.

13)   Because everyone exhaled.  Sorry.  That is not a good one.  I am tired today.

14)   Go figure that Richard Sherman would have something to say about the N-word.  He says a ban wouldn’t work.  I kind of actually and finally agree with the guy.  Maybe not for the exact reasoning he says, but I agree it is too broad to enforce.

15)   A climber who already holds the fastest Mt. Everest climb will up the ante here in the next few months.  I guess he doesn’t enjoy coming down the mountain that much, as he will just jump off the summit in a wing suit and cruise back down through air.  Sounds like a good plan.  Better you than me.

16)   If I had the free time and finances, I would just jump on a flight and go to the Finish Line where Ravens S Matt Elam works.  Must be pretty obvious.

17)   Embiid will sit the last two games of the regular season for KU.  I am not worried on what this does for KU overall.  I am sad the guy will lose money in the draft with this recurring injury.

18)   Anquan Boldin will stay with the Niners.  Yeah.  If I am just looking for a few catches and maybe a ring, I am sticking with Colin Kaepernick.  Could be worse ways to go out, right?

19)   That is it.  Hope you enjoyed or are at least more informed.  Will I blog tomorrow?  That is a CLOWN question, bro.  Peace.

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