In my opinion, the ONLY 5 minute span when the band Journey was actually cool…

Read it, don’t read it, I don’t care…just needed to get some things off my chest.

In no particular order of chronology or importance…

On the clock.  Twenty minutes, lunch break.

Let’s turn and burn.

1)  I hear that Dolphins QB Ryan Tannehill doesn’t know which teams are in which conferences or divisions.  http://content.usatoday.com/communities/thehuddle/post/2012/08/ryan-tannenhill-doesnt-know-the-nfls-divisions/1#.UD5fYcGPU8k

Don’t worry about it, Ryan.  I won’t make fun of you about your lack of knowledge.  You don’t need to worry or stress about a thing.  Here is all you need to know.  New England, Buffalo, and New York will ALL be much better than you, so just play the team that marches out on the field and may the force be with you.

2)  I have no words.  The Fillerbuster is boiling over like when Chandler looks at Joey in Friends and says “TOO many jokes.”  Therefore, I will steal a line from the show where I saw this on.  I guess this sport IS harder than we thought.  I guess there IS a rush getting ANY medal in the Olympics.  http://awkwardsports.wordpress.com/2012/08/06/team-usa-rowing-team-member-has-a-boner/

3)  Tosh.O saves all of us working folk a lot of time online.  Instead of us taking the time to look funny stuff up, we can just watch his show, AND hear great feedback on the videos.  Hilarious show.

4)  I am a Steeler fan.  THIS is why I tend to NOT like a lot of OTHER Steeler fans.  Stop getting us stereotyped, and stay out of Capitol Hill in Denver, please.  http://sports.yahoo.com/blogs/nfl-shutdown-corner/steelers-tattoo-might-brilliant-probably-not-162936217–nfl.html

5)  Djokovic lost TWO games in three sets in his opener at the US Open.  He hardly broke a sweat.  Actually, he didn’t by the time they interviewed him.  His net stats were way up from other tournaments, and right now Federer is saying “great, and now is going to be a proficient NET player???”

6)  Two upsets yesterday at the Open.  One we care about, and one we don’t.  From the men’s side, #10 Monaco lost.  Whatever.  From the women’s side, previous #1 Wozniacki lost to an unknown.  Hey, girl.  You will have PLENTY of time to hang out with Rory once the dust settles if you two work out.  Why don’t you try and win while you are still in your prime?  Second big tournament with a second early exit.  By the way, it seems that Rory is doing JUST fine in your little relationship.  Correct me if I am wrong, but he just destroyed some shit at the last Major.  Lock and load, Wozniacki.

7)  The NCAA FBS changed up some rules for this year as they seem to do annually now.  I don’t mind one, hate another, and love another.  In order, they moved the kickoff yard line to the 35 as opposed to the 30, they moved a touchback to the 25 (what?  That is dumb and uncalled for), and now finally a defense can register a score in overtime.

8)  Stephen Strasburg just had his worse outing in his career.  My conspiracy theory?  The Nats, trying to keep the masses happy, have told him to start throwing games (not literally) so that they say they shut him down because he lost the strike zone instead of because he hit a certain amount of innings.  Brilliant.

9)  How cool?  K Billy Cundiff, a couple days after being released by the Ravens, gets picked up by the Redskins.  Dude doesn’t have to move residences now.

10)  I don’t care HOW badass your running back stable is presently, Stanford.  If you redshirt Barry Sanders, Jr., I will be angry and so will all other lovers of running backs that defy human being standards.  Watch his high school highlights.  You can SEE the dad in him.

11)  I LOVE that the White Sox players had to travel in Caddyshack outfits to their game the other day.   That sounds like a lot of fun.  n-n-n-n-n-n–n-n-n…   na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na….NOONAN!  http://content.usatoday.com/communities/dailypitch/post/2012/08/chicago-white-sox-theme-trip-caddyshack/1#.UD5i6MGPU8k

11a)  I don’t care whether Dangerfield doesn’t seem funny these days, that movie is a classic and still one of my favs.

12)  I hear that Jerry Jones said that Dez Bryant WANTED guidance and there are no Bryant rules.  Like you are going to listen to THIS guy…http://www.nydailynews.com/sports/football/video-jerry-jones-rap-debut-dallas-cowboys-owner-raps-commercial-papa-john-pizza-article-1.1145645

13)  Andy Roddick won his first round match at the Open in straight sets.  Wait for it, wait for the disappointment.  It is coming unfortunately.  2nd round?  3rd rounds?  What a waste of talent.  And YOU wanted to be called ARod after you won your first and only Grand Slam event?  I think not, bro.  You are just Andy until told otherwise.

14)  The USC QB billboard near the UCLA campus is suddenly just gone.  This would be funnier if this was still a rivalry.  Hey, UCLA, you can’t just be in the same town.  It is only a rivalry if both teams win one here and there against the other.  Otherwise, it is just called an “ownership.”  If you take out the “vacated wins,” then UCLA has a win in 2006 and one in 1998.  It is 2012, people.

15)  Courtesy of Lindsey.  I am not sure what the hell I would personally do if I encountered one of THESE.  http://www.flickr.com/photos/artour_a/4207478815/

16)  Rangers pitcher Yu Darvish had 10 K’s last night.  The league might have to just roll over if the Rangers keep picking up steam as a unit like they presently are.

17)  That is it.  Twenty minutes.  Damn.  I wasn’t done.  I guess I will have a head start on material for tomorrow.  Will I blog tomorrow?  That is a CLOWN question, bro.  Peace.

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