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I still like you guys, but I liked you BETTER when you were younger and angrier…

Read it, don’t read it, I don’t care…just needed to get some things off my chest.

In no particular order of chronology or importance…

On the clock.  Work break/ sanity check.  Let’s turn and burn.

1)  NON SPORTS hook to start.  Congrats to my good buddy and big brother from the fraternity days (even though he is definitively shorter than me), Scott.  Not only did his first child, Zack, come into the world late last night via his beautiful wife, Emily, but the lad did it ON the exact projected due date (that is rare, right?).  I guess this is good news for a kid who probably already has a basketball in his crib.  Be ON time to all father-son practices, Zack.

1a)  I like the name, Scott.  I would have gone Zeke, but it is YOUR kid.

2)  Cam Newton, entrenched in a lower than expected output year, apparently unwound during his bye week and is now “refreshed.”  Word is he had talked with his dad about leadership, went go-kart racing, played video games, went to a haunted house or two, and watched some movies.  No word whether watching game tape of his mediocre season was involved in any way.

3)  Kevin Garnett has proclaimed the Nets will be a “force” this year and will give the Celtics a run this year after a couple years of being the lame team of the division.  I think his compliments are nice, Deron is happy to hear them, but Garnett is still trying to figure out who is guarding him down low and salivating slightly.  It is a set up, Deron and Joe.

4)  Coming off a miserable loss to Tennessee, hearing a song by my band on the radio this morning, and engaging in a conversation about both today with a colleague, I have come to an odd conclusion about Big Ben.  As Linkin Park’s songs were better when the lead singer was an angry young man, the Steelers were better when he was not hearing college chicks say no and wrecking motorcycles.

5)  Ray Lewis is out.  Terrell Suggs is in evidently.  They will NEED him against a pissed off Texans team.  Talk about accelerated game shape.

6)  The LAST thing I thought I would hear when I got in Eleanor to go home from the airport last night was the END of the Cardinals/ Giants game, which got delayed 3 plus hours, or basically the length of my flight.  The Cards got the job done, Mike Matheny looks anything BUT a first year manager, and we all wonder what the hell Albert Pujols is doing for fun in his free time these days.  Maybe he joined Cam Newton go-kart racing.

7)  The ALCS game got postponed because of rain last night.  The scheduling geniuses decided to have the game at 2pm Mountain today.  Fancy, in a bad way.  I would rather have the game on at the same time as the football game and I could flip rather then miss it totally.  Idiots.

8)  Calvin Pace calls the New England offense “borderline Illegal.”  The masses call the Jets borderline “how the HELL are you guys 3-3?”

9)  I hear Miami is thinking about adding A-Rod next year.  Might as well.  No one but you would take that contract of his, you have MUCH more bikini models to hit on during games, he is FROM there, we can make “take his talents to South Beach” jokes, and he has time to chat on the phone in about 14 minutes, when he is NOT in the lineup for Game 4.

9a)  Funny.  Lonely and rich, Donald Trump said that he personally would “fire” A-Rod.  Good for you if you don’t know why that is funny.

10)  Lindsey made dinner last night: bacon wrapped chicken with cheese and Italian Bacon Cream Cheese (that is what she coined her creation as).  Either she likes me a lot and understands my love of cream cheese, bacon, and chicken, or this is a long term plot to give me a coronary.  I don’t care.  It was delicious.

11)  Barry Bonds is back in the news.  Fresh off of being spotted all over Colorado doing his new love of cycling, he went out and purchased the most expensive bicycle that has ever been made.  18k.  I think this is a match made in heaven.  Dude just shifted from a sport that is trying NOT to cheat anymore to a sport where pretty much everyone and their mother cheats.  You go, Barry.

11a)  Speaking of cheaters, Lance Armstrong officially stepped down from his head post at his charity, Livestrong.  Hey, Barry, if YOU decide to head up this thing now, I suggest the names “Barry Loyal to the Cause” or “Building Bonds.”

12)  Gabby Douglas is Sportswoman of the Year evidently.  She lost her patented event, overall medal or not.  Can’t we wait another few months to determine the winner?

13)  Derek Jeter will be out for 4-5 months due to injury.  Works out well for coming back to spring training.  He will still have plenty of time to practice with his new third baseman.

14)  Rex Ryan has called Bill Belichick the “best coach in football,”  showing his extreme humbleness and respect.  What does this mean?  We have about 36 hours before he says something REALLY dumb to set the world back at equilibrium.

15)  MMA fighter Chael Sonnen fired back at critics and media for thinking he was not deserving of a title shot.  THIS is exactly why he was chosen.  He will at least make it exciting for the media craze, and probably build enough hatred to make it a very watched fight.  Dude is going to get worked after Jon Jones elbow heals.  I guess that will make your lifetime record a stellar 17-13, Chael.  Nice work.

16)  That is it.  Back to work.  Will I blog tomorrow?  That is a CLOWN question, bro.  Peace.