Read it, don’t read it, I don’t care…just needed to get some things off my chest.
In no particular order of chronology or importance…
On the clock and THEN some. Only family situations override the start of a Steelers games…and they play in 50 minutes. There is no way I will get through this huge list, but I will give it an A for effort. Let’s turn and burn.
1) Joe Girardi evidently called the press box to have his taking A- Rod out of the game NOT include A-Rod’s name. You know what? Life is ok when the Yankees are losing. Life is ok when they are winning. But, life is GOOD when they are dysfunctional.
2) Now that K-State is no longer a secret (damn them for destroying all of these good teams), is Louisville the most secretive undefeated team in the FBS right now? Are they really 8-0?
3) Larry Bowa interviewed for the Marlins the other day? I only know him from being the badass Phillies shortstop back in the day, but I can take one look at him and will say “hire that man.” I don’t think he jives with Fidel Castro either, so that is one in the “plus” column.
4) Mark Cuban is making jokes about David Stern leaving. Mark. Read the WHOLE article. It doesn’t happen until 2014. He still has over a year to fine you. Lay low.
5) A professional soccer player broke out a Spiderman mask after scoring the other day. Chad Johnson has already called the guy to go out for drinks. I hear the conversation went “what is your schedule, Chad?” “I have no schedule, man.”
6) SO sad to hear about the Marcus Lattimore injury. Aside from not wanting someone to get injured as a general morale, I will say this. One injury raises NFL scouts’ eyebrows. Two pretty much drops you four rounds on a dime. I am sure the family was sad about his well-being, but I will give them about 15% of “Damn. There goes that financial solution.”
7) Does anyone else sneeze at one sitting like me? My over/ under is always 14, but today I woke up and viciously sneezed 19 times. Not pansy sneezes. Loud, vicious ones.
8) San Fran won again. I am sad that San Fran is in the World Series. Do I dislike them? No. I am sad because they are just OWNING people, and the reason why I like postseason baseball is being nullified because none of their opponents seem IN the game. I said it before and I will say it again. They are like watching a hot goalie in the NHL playoffs. They look untouchable.
9) I hear that LeBron took the time out of his schedule and said that he wants to be the best of all time. Ummm. I am glad ONE ring has triggered something, but I am sitting here writing a blog, and I also want to be the best of all time. Thanks for the insight.
10) I am halfway through my book…The Panther. It is incredible. DeMille built up this trip across the desert in the best way possible, and then delivered. Now, I have 300 pages left of excitement. If only he could write a book with John Corey once a month, I would stay at home all the time. Anyway, I was depressed to read that John Corey, with all of his similarities to my humor, DOESN’T like straight ice tea. John, that is my favorite non-alcoholic beverage. Damn. We DO disagree.
11) Is there a point spread that Bama can’t beat? They were 20 plus point favorites against the #11 team in the nation. Ho hum. They looked like they stopped scoring to be nice.
12) When the kid gives Will Smith the dog out of the helicopter in I Am Legend, it moves you. At least it should. I will never forget calling my buddy, Kyle, irate about him recommending the movie but NOT telling me the dog dies. All movies these days have alternative endings on DVD’s these days. Give me an alternative ending where Sam doesn’t have to die.
13) For some reason, I am listening to OU812 by Van Halen over the last few days. Not only is going to Cabo Wabo on my bucket list, but I LOVE the line he Sammy says about it. “Go there once, and you will be there twice.” Can’t wait. Someday.
14) I knew it was coming. Eleanor didn’t break DOWN, but I knew some things were wrong. Preventive maintenance. Anyway, I am recovering from spending $925 on her yesterday. It is kind of cool that my brakes don’t shake the car now when I am slowing down, but that is still a lot of money. The one thing I WILL say is The Shoppe’s Pam allowed me to use her car for the day. Nothing like driving around a tiny 1976 bright yellow Toyota Corolla for the day. I got some LOOKS. What SUCKS is that I still have one more thing to fix on Eleanor, but they didn’t have time Saturday. I have owned two Jeeps, and have seen “leaking crankshaft seal” a lot, but I find it funny that the part costs $22.50, and the labor costs $513. Uggghhh.
15) I admit it. I thought that “Quagmire” was just a funny name on Family Guy. I read the word in an article the other day. It is an actual WORD? I can see myself throwing THAT word into conversation over the next couple weeks.
16) ESPN Gameday was extra incredible this week. Lee Corso always does something fun, and when he put an old school Sooners hat on, it was funny enough. BUT. When he pulled out a shotgun, shot it, and almost made Kirk lose his shit, it was INCREDIBLE. That would have been awesome to watch live at the scene. I would have LOVED to see that live in Norman.
17) I went to the grocery store the other day and almost fell down. They make a “bacon provolone” tomato sauce. I didn’t think it would work, but strongly feel that eggs, cheese, and bacon should be put on EVERYTHING. I ate it last night. Just a touch of bacon, and DELICIOUS. Go to the grocery store right now (after my rant) and get some.
18) Hey, Florida Gators. If you get 6 turnovers in a game, it is bad. Hey, Florida Gators, did you notice Jarvis Jones’ stat line? 13 tackles, 5 for a loss. 3 sacks. 2 fumbles forced. 2 fumbles recovered. Including the winning fumble forced. Any questions?
19) Hello, Duke. It was a good run, but I am glad SOMEONE reminded you that you suck at football. That hook would be SO much better if UVA, my school, was ANY good at all.
20) CU got 45 1/2 points. I guess someone made Oregon think they had to beat the spread by halftime.
21) Texas Tech has looked good over the last few weeks. Then, they met up with K-State. Anyone else have any questions about this team? I feel bad for them. Now, if Notre Dame runs the table, they will be screwed. There is NO way that Notre Dame doesn’t make the title game if they go undefeated. We have been forced to watched ND on main TV for the last 20 years when they have sucked. Bama-ND? Networks are salivating right now.
22) Pats’ Bob Kraft says that London is now ready to have an NFL team? Are YOU paying for all of the travel, Bob? I have a million questions, but can you start me off with a monologue of a possible explanation of logistics?
23) Deron Williams is busy these days. He is saying that Raymond Felton is a better guard than Jeremy Lin (umm. why do we care what you think about that?). He also is saying he might need “offseason” surgery on his ankle. He DOES realize the season HASN’T started, and therefore he is STILL in offseason? Why don’t you bust out that surgery right NOW, Einstein?
24) (Chuckle) A Florida 19 year old (and not in college, so he can’t be too bright) basketball player hurt himself “trying to video himself jumping over a moving car.” Where do I start on this one? I see why you didn’t start at any college without playing basketball. SAT’s must not have been good. Do they still take those things?
25) I am sure people had a lot of fun last night on the celebration of Halloween. I did too. I had one baseball game and three top notch football games…and a couch…and a wish for 3 more TV’s.
26) Do college kids who think they are tough running out of the end zone realize that the new rules put them at the 25 yard line if they just take a knee?
27) Sometimes Lindsey and I have occasional age gap conversations. She didn’t know who Bo Jackson or Herschel Walker were. It is not her fault, and it made me realize that I am turning 40 this year.
28) I lost one sock and my swimsuit. Those are two very irritating things to lose. Losing a sock is like abandoning the other one, and I am assuming that my swimsuit is hanging in a Hampton Inn on the east coast somewhere.
29) OU-ND (mandatory watching since Lindsey was there at the game):
-on the play near the end of the first half, not even the announcers knew what was going on. Bell scored, and Musburger thought they were kicking the extra point on 2nd and goal. NO one saw the ref make the announcement. There WAS a hold, but very odd how it transpired.
-OU lost, but CRAZY that Notre Dame FINALLY allowed it’s FIRST rushing TD all year after 8 games. That is sick.
-If you are not aware, Manti Te’o is the best football player in the entire land.
-the AFLAC question was the last linebacker to be top 3 in Heisman votes for LB’s. I didn’t get it (I thought Derrick Brooks). Kirk didn’t get it (he thought it was Derrick Brooks). MARVIN JONES.
-ND QB Golson grew up during the game. No excuse for trying to run when the middle LB came up on him in the first half and not seeing his wide open TE, but you could SEE his development as the game went on. One of his best plays was throwing it away on a broken play. Maturity.
-ND put the RB in motion at least 4 times to move the middle LB for a Golson run up the middle that I saw.
-That 2nd and 2 where they play actioned OU and went long up the middle was the best play call of the game.
-Brian Kelly’s trust in Golson was off the charts. Amazing play calls after various mistakes.
-Did anyone else find it funny that on the last touchdown, Golson was already heading to the sidelines before there was a TD signal by the refs?
-Manti Te’o is the best player in FBS if I haven’t mentioned it. Maybe Jarvis Jones a close second.
-If you are wondering what my schedule for the next week will be, it will be consoling Lindsey from this loss.
-this is the first year Stoops has ever lost twice at home. He hasn’t had a championship in a long while, and they are consistently good, but this loss officially puts him on the lukewarm seat. You can’t be losing at home with that kind of talent.
-ND is mad at USC. They needed them to beat Arizona to REALLY solidify why they should be #2.
30) I am angry at myself that it took so long in my life to realize that a fried egg on a traditional pizza tastes SO good.
31) Before you say the Steelers are suddenly owned by Nike, remember these are 1934 throwbacks. It is history, not a bad attempt on style.
32) Is anyone else excited that Bama and LSU play next week? LSU will be one of the best -9 point spread teams of all time. Just ballparking it.
33) USC WR Marquis Lee had a ridiculous 300 plus yards Saturday. Interesting fact to tell your friends. THREE of the top 5 receiving days in history by a receiver…have lost the game.
34) I like going out on Halloween and watching two people, having a normal conversation, with one person being decked out in a costume and the other person in normal clothes.
35) I think my age bracket is classified as the following. If you can recite every word of Vincent Price’s monologue in Thriller, then you are my age.
35a) I have won karaoke contests with that song. Except, I say “Filler….Filler night” instead of “Thriller.”
36) I heard Eddie Murphy’s Party All the Time last night. Yes, he could sing, too. His downfall started at Beverly Hills Cop III.
37) There is a difference between “home drunk” and “bar drunk.”
38) Last night, I saw this classy looking chick leave with a gangster dude. Weird. I wonder what SHE is thinking about this time this morning.
39) That is it. Steelers game is starting. Hope you enjoyed. Will I blog tomorrow? That is a CLOWN question, bro. Peace.