Read it, don’t read it, I don’t care…just needed to get some things off my chest.
In no particular order of chronology or importance…
Not on the clock. It’s Sunday. Let’s turn and burn.
1) I hate dogs dying, and yet I am still a sucker for I Am Legend when it is on TV. Watching it right now. Damn. I think we all would like to know how we would handle that situation of being the last person on earth.
2) Way to make a dog die immediately, The Conjuring. More on this later.
3) Lindsey, after now loving to know blackjack and poker, just learned liar’s poker. Whoops. I made change for a $10 bill a couple of times today.
4) Not because I was losing. Because we needed fresh ones. I am VERY good at liar’s poker, and used to double my bar tips playing it…along with simply putting a Nerf bball hoop above my tip jar. “I will buy you a drink if you make 5 in a row. Otherwise. It is mine.”
5) Oh, that’s right. This is a SPORTS blog. Let’s get to it.
6) It is Sunday night, meaning I could run around naked and not bother anyone. Dexter and True Blood night.
7) What will happen first? Announcers recognizing that a pure defensive player could win the Heisman or more than 50% of writers being able to spell Jadeveon?
8) Greg Oden will go to the Heat. I think he fits better in the Spurs system, I think he could grow more in a less media New Orleans market, but hell. The Heat? They just won, right? It definitely isn’t a BAD choice. Enjoy the bright lights and microscope, Greg.
9) I have to take a break and go to the kitchen, but I will keep writing. I am scared that the same thing will happen to me as Kolb. Beaten down by a MAT.
10) I hear that Matt Garza had a rant this weekend. That is MY word, Matt. Back off.
11) I don’t care about True Blood, and the world doesn’t care about A-Rod. I can flow chart that if you want to.
12) It is a shame Missy Franklin is not hot. There would be so many more jokes and stories about her winning her 6th Gold Medal this weekend at the World Championships.
13) I officially give the world my approval on The Conjuring as the scariest movie I have seen in decades (not much competition of course). I have always said the last scary movie I saw was The Shining. My mom taught me that horror movie is doing its job if two things are happening. One, it scares you without gore. Two, it does this and has you jumping at fast movements, thunder, etc. This movie did both well. It kept everything psychological as opposed to having Friday the 13th and Nightmare on Elm Street blood baths. I enjoyed it despite a movie heckler. I have an incomplete critique. Some cool high school kid was saying “your mom,” “whoa,” and “no way” during every scary part. I thought about pulling an “opposite” George, but just went to the manager to get free tickets for next time (succeeded) instead. Amazingly, the theater manager found it odd that someone would stop yelling out things when a guy with a flashlight stood in front of him. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EzxfivZF9Yk
14) Why did it take me until age age 30 to figure out how brilliant carrying around Ziplocs was? The rain came yesterday big time in Denver, and everyone was so curious about how I put my phone and wallet in a Ziploc and then just stayed out in the rain. Such a simple concept, but so clever and practical.
15) Cris Carter’s HOF speech was pretty moving, and Bill Parcells basically gave a pretty good coaching class during his.
16) It was great seeing Tiger be Tiger in destroying the field at Bridgestone. This is a non story though until he does the same thing at a Major. You can win all of the “others” and act happy. You still need FIVE, man.
17) Mark Sanchez was booed at a scrimmage. Are these people from Morgantown or are these the leftover Tebow fans? You guys really don’t have a lot of options you do know, right? This is kind of like the drama based QB version of the Steelers running back scenario.
18) When Mark Cuban says he is ok with rebuilding, I feel like I am listening to the 1984 Portland Trailblazers explaining their pick of Sam Bowie. You swung, missed, and just admit it.
19) Touching story of the Browns letting a 5 year old cancer survivor score a touchdown. The Browns ARE good for something since they suck at actually winning. http://ftw.usatoday.com/2013/08/5-year-old-cancer-survivor-scores-touchdown-for-the-browns/
20) I went from being the biggest fan of Johnny Manziel last year before anyone knew who he was to now the guy who truly HOPES he took money for those autographs. He will be one of the biggest idiots ever if busted, and now we have an explanation to where he got all that cash at the casino last year.
21) Lindsey and I went with another couple to Lakeside yesterday. This would basically be your low ball bumpy roller coaster, Tilt a Whirl, Scrambler place…by a lake of course. I actually was able to tear myself away from winning little kids stuffed animals on the basketball game after not too long. Of course, it was also because the basketball game was paying out stuffed basketballs and footballs as opposed to cute little animals.
22) Riley Cooper has informed the team that he has received threats about his video tirade. Hey, people. Stop threatening him. I believe he has already done enough damage to himself on his OWN. The pain he has in that locker room alone has to be pretty dicey.
23) How long have The Roots been the Jimmy Fallon house band? That might JUST about get me to watch the show.
24) Before going into watching The Conjuring, I was staring at this sign about a new Ben Affleck movie. Then, we saw the long previews for it IN the movie theater. Maybe I just miss Rounders, but I am already predicting that Runner, Runner becomes one of my favorite movies ever. Plus, it has JT in it. I tried not to like the guy, but he was money in The Social Network.
25) Speaking of boy bands, the Backstreet Boys are really coming out with a NEW album? There are people THAT smart to be able to hide all band members away from the relentless teasing in the media for the last 10 years? I am impressed.
26) Horseradish sauce isn’t just for prime rib, people. Drop by the Red Square in Denver for horseradish vodka shots and put horseradish cheddar cheese…well, on anything.
27) Jason Kidd is using Elysium and Matrix for team motivation. Whatever. I don’t exactly feel like running through a wall after seeing Keanu Reeves choose between the red and blue pill. Come on, Jason. You are 40 years old. Stick with Rocky for Pete’s sake.
28) A bear is caught on video stealing from the same restaurant twice in 24 hours. Seriously. Make this into a commercial. “What we throw away is even good.” http://deadspin.com/bear-steals-dumpster-from-restaurant-twice-in-24-hours-1001128290
29) Two Rockies minor leaguers face first degree rape charges. Two good looking minor leaguers can’t get laid the old fashion way. Sad, sad, sad. If you two were trying to make my Rant Squad, I admire your proactivity, but I would rather see non rape activities, and you can’t get locked up THAT fast to be on my team. You need THREE offenses. Geez. You guys were a waste of Rant Squad talent.
30) I just really, TRULY don’t understand people having typos when permanently painting something on their skin.
31) That is it. Hope you enjoyed. Will I blog tomorrow? That is a CLOWN question (.270, 16, 37), bro. Peace.